12/29/06

Saddam Hussein Executed a few sublime 360s...

Then they hung him from the vert ramp.

Media outlets were always quick to report on anything and everything Saddam Hussein was up to, except his love of "sidewalk surfing". Saddam would often sneak out of his palaces at night to grind on statues and monuments. They say it was his painstaking and relentless dedication which was integral in the development of the "darkslide".

Saddam, known as a ferocious dictator, was a humble if not fully stoked skater. When he demanded that the Republican Guard start a "Sk8 Corps" for an eventual run at the X games everyone feared the worst. But Saddam always looked pleased when he atttended "Sk8 Corps" practice. Surprising everyone, Saddam always quickly offered an enthusiastic "wicked sick" or a stoic yet sincere "decent" to anyone and everyone. Including women. He was once heard to remark, "Sure she's a chick, but did you see that kickflip to indy!?!"

Saddam's coffin will be wheeled out to its final resting place on a handcarved 7 foot long by 2 and a half foot replica of Powell Peralta Rose Bones Deck. The trucks carved from Mahgony and the wheels fashioned from the finest marble. All pallbearers will wear black Vans.

Cheer and celebrate the death of Hussein the brutal dictator, but hang your head low and mourn, if only for a moment, the death of Saddam of Dogtown.

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